We’ve all been there—working tirelessly to grow something we thought we wanted, only to wake up one day realizing… we don’t even like it. If that hits close to home, you’re not alone. In fact, that’s exactly why I’m writing this. Because too many brilliant, high-achieving women are pouring themselves into businesses that drain them instead of fueling them.

In my recent conversation with Gabs Hayes on INHABIT with Alessia Citro, we went straight into the heart of this truth. We unpacked the messy, emotional, and sometimes painful reality of what happens when success costs too much—your peace, your presence, and the moments that matter most. And more importantly, we explored how to stop building businesses you secretly hate and start creating something you’ll love living with every day.

So let me ask you: How can you design a business that gives you life instead of taking it?

The Wake-Up Call No One Wants but Everyone Needs

Gabs’ wake-up call came in the most heartbreaking way—losing her son Gabriel. That moment shattered the rules she thought she had to follow.

Her words still ring in my ears:

“Nobody’s rules saved my kid. So nobody’s rules matter in my life anymore.”

From there, she began redefining success—not by the size of her revenue, but by the size of her impact and the state of her peace. And she realized something many of us avoid admitting: hustle culture is a lie, and boundaries aren’t a luxury—they’re oxygen.

Why “Success” Is Burning You Out

Here’s the hard truth:

• You can hit seven figures and still feel empty.
• You can have all the trips, the freedom, the flexible schedule… and still miss the moments that matter most.
• You can be “successful” on paper and quietly resent what you’ve built.

Gabs calls out the false metrics that keep entrepreneurs chained to burnout. She reminds us that chasing revenue without alignment only magnifies the problem.

If you’ve been following the “shoulds” instead of your soul, it’s time to course-correct.

Stop Building Businesses You Secretly Hate

When I asked Gabs how to actually do this, her answer was refreshingly practical: start with the life you want, then build the business to match.

Her strategies included:

• Designing your model so it supports your actual lifestyle goals (not just your income goals)
• Structuring time in a way that honors your natural energy cycles
• Saying yes to only the clients, offers, and projects that align with your values
• Building community so you don’t carry the weight alone

She also shared her “mini sabbaticals” — intentional getaways every quarter to refocus, batch creative work, and reset her energy.

The Power of Letting Go of Outcomes

One of my favorite moments from our talk was when Gabs dropped this truth bomb:

“You literally have zero control of the outcome of anything.”

That doesn’t mean we stop showing up. It means we stop tying our worth—and our joy—to results we can’t control. Instead, we focus on what we can influence: our actions, our integrity, and how we feel in the process.

What You’ll Learn in This Episode

By the end of the conversation, you’ll know how to:

• Identify if you’re building a business that’s out of alignment
• Redefine success based on your values, not the industry standard
• Set boundaries that work for your unique life
• Create systems that protect your energy
• Build a supportive community that lightens your load

Your Next Step

It’s time to stop chasing someone else’s version of success. Stop building businesses you secretly hate—and start creating one that lights you up, sustains your energy, and leaves room for the people and moments that make life rich.

Whether you’re a parent entrepreneur, a creative professional, or a driven founder ready for more alignment, this episode is your permission slip to choose differently.

🎧 Listen to the full conversation with Gabs Hayes on Apple Podcasts or Spotify and start building a business you actually love.

This blog post was generated by AI. Want to learn how I do this in 5 minutes or less? I teach this and more in The Audio Authority Blueprint Podcast [Systems Only] program. Click here to learn more.